Monday, March 08, 2010

Her Name

We have finally settled on a name for Barker Baby girl #2.

We are getting excited that in about 14 weeks we'll be welcoming our second daughter,

Evelyn Nadine Barker
into our home and life.

We both love the name Evelyn and think it's simply beautiful. The name has several meanings, two of which are "Desired" and "Life". We feel this is very appropriate as we had a desire for another baby for a long time before we were blessed with her life. We are so very thankful for this blessing and simply can't wait to meet our second little girl!

The name Nadine was my grandmother's middle name. My grandmother passed away less than a year ago. It means a lot to me that we'll be able to give this baby the name of someone who I loved so dearly.

Before my grandmother passed away, we wrote letters back and forth for years. She lived in Missouri and even though I lived many miles away most of my growing up years we still wrote very consistently. Now that she is gone I cherish all those letters so much more. So, after we chose to use her middle name for our baby, I wrote her one last letter, which I've posted below.


Dear Grandma,

I really miss you. Sometimes it is still so hard for me to believe that you are gone. When Grandpa died and you were in good health I thought we'd get several more years with you, but that isn't what happened. Only a year later we had to say goodbye to you as well. With your passing we also had to say goodbye to the place we had come to visit you for our entire lives. Your house holds so many memories and it is hard to know that there is no going back to that time. Only in my mind can I go back to your house and sit on your couch and remember the many conversations we had.

Over the years so many wonderful memories were made at your house. I can remember so clearly the placing of each piece of furniture and the smell that always greeted us when you opened your door. I can almost still feel your soft hands holding mine. I still easily remember the sound of Grandpa sleeping in his recliner, snoring, while we sat across the room and chatted. I remember hearing story after story about your childhood and my dad's childhood as well.

When I had my first baby I remember talking to you about being a mother and now I'm amazed at the details you remembered about your pregnancies, and your children's toddler years even though it had been so long since that stage in your life.

Thank you Grandma for all the stories, all the conversations and all the memories made over the years. I remember doing puppet shows in your living room with stuffed animals when I was little, I remember sleeping in the "pink bedroom" when we came to visit and it's hard to believe that that bed is now in my own home ready for my guests to come for a visit.

I am so thankful for the countless letters we exchanged over the years when I lived far away. I know I probably heard from you and wrote you at least twice a month for as long as I can remember. And, in case you didn't know, I've saved all of those letters. Grandma, your handwriting was so beautiful and it always made my day brighter when I'd go to the mailbox and see a letter from you! I miss those letters and I miss being able to write you back too.

So, today I'm writing you one more time because I have something special to tell you.

Before you passed I know you had been praying with us about another baby. Well, about six weeks after your funeral we found out we were pregnant again! I know you would have rejoiced in our news, as you loved all of our babies so much.

After we found out that we were having another girl we talked a lot about names and I wanted to share with you what we’ve chosen.

Grandma, I want you to know that we’ve named this little one, Evelyn Nadine Barker.

We’ve given her your middle name as her middle name. I wanted to name her after you to help me remember what a wonderful grandmother you always were to me. To always remember all those things about you that I love and terribly miss. I want to honor you by using your name and someday I want to be the kind of grandmother to her children that you were to me.
I want to love her babies as much as you loved all your babies, grand babies and great grand babies.

And, I pray she will always love her family as much as you loved yours.
I'll always miss you.

Love, Jana


Heather said...

Oh Jana, that is such a beautiful name for so many reasons. I too am hoping that if we have a little girl someday her middle name will be Ruth, after my grandmother who passed away last April.

And the name Evelyn is so great too! Beautiful choice all around. :-)

Jana said...

Heather, my middle name is Ruth, which is after my grandmother too. :)

Katie said...

Awwww Jana...sniff, sniff. Such a sweet letter and, again, I love the name and I think it is wonderful that you are honoring your grandmother with using her name. Evelyn will grow up knowing the reason for her namesake and she will come to cherish it just like you do. Can't wait to meet her!

Kel said...

Thanks for sharing your beautiful letter. I know your grandma would be so proud of you and all that you continue to become. I love you and I can't wait to meet, hold and love Evelyn Nadine Barker!

Becca said...

Asa's middle name is after my grandfather's middle name. I love that every time I say or think his whole name, I think of my grandfather--a wonderful man of God who has left a rich, spiritual legacy to us. And we pray Asa loves and honors God the way his great grandpa did! I love talking to Asa about his great grandpa and have a poem my mom wrote him for his 80th birthday framed in Asa's room.

How special for her to know the significance of her name!

Dad said...

I'm sure Grandma would feel very honored by you giving Evelyn her middle name. It's almost like part of her lives on through her name. Love you!

Susanna Rose said...

I LOVE the name choice...especially since Evelyn can have really cute shortenings as well!:) And how awesome that you wrote that letter...I love choosing names with significance as well, whether familial or biblical, it makes them so much more special!:)

Jason and Kim Vinson said...

So beautiful and sweet. Thanks for sharing. Evelyn is my Grandma's name. I love that name as well as Nadine, so unique and beautiful.